Of responsibilities and madness
by silverempire
Summary: The White Queen muses about the meaning of her title and the relationship between her champion and her hatter


**Author****'s note: **Hello All, this is my first Alice in Wonderland fic…It was written in about 20 minutes, under the influence of the movie which I just had come home from watching. I was in such a rapture that I just had to write something about it…It's Alice/Hatter (sort of), but it also contains mentions of unrequited love on the White Queen's side. I hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimers: **I always wish I can write something witty for these disclaimers, like some other authors do, but I somehow always end up writing that these characters, and anything related to them, don't belong to me.

**Of responsibilities and madness**

It is difficult. Being a Queen, having responsibilities, having an entire population that looks upon you so expectantly as if their felicity depended solely on your person.

I hardly imagined it _before_; before I fought my own sister, before I claimed again the crown that was mine by right, before I was appointed as the only Queen of Underland.

Of course, I had already been a Queen, before the deceiving of my sister, but I was younger then, and the world had not known such miseries and sorrows yet. It was easier, in those peaceful times, meeting people's expectations, provided that they had any at all. Everyone's intent was put entirely on dancing, and laughing, and generally being happy.

Now, my people were focused on re-building, on tending their wounds, on mending their broken hearts, and I found myself at a loss of how to help them.

I watched them as they sang and danced after the slaying of the Jabberwocky, their hearts finally able to rejoice their much awaited freedom. All but one, who seemed not to have any reason at all for being as content as the others.

He stood in a corner, looking mournful and miserable. His eyes were downcast, the amused smile that usually graced his face was strangely absent. My heart went out to him as I understood the reason for his being so unhappy.

I approached him quietly.

"Hatter", I began, unsure of how I should continue the conversation. We had been good friends, when I first was Queen, before he went totally mad, but I didn't know whether he still valued our acquaintance, whether he would confide in me as he used to do.

He raised his eyes to look at me, but they lacked their usual sparkling brilliance. The green in them was gone, replaced by a dark blue.

He smiled apologetically at me. "I'm sorry, my Queen, if I cannot join the party. My mind is set on many other matters at the moment." He grinned triumphantly. "I said five words that begin with an 'M' in a single sentence. That's quite an achievement!"

I smiled in spite of myself. "I didn't want to disturb your musings, Tarrant, but you looked quite sad. I came to say that I am here, if you need to talk."

He looked away. "There is nothing to talk about, except maybe the fact that a raven can look like a writing desk. Why that is, I don't have the faintest idea. But nothing else must be spoken about. I would probably need a cup of tea, right now, but I made peace with Time, and I'm at a loss of what to do since it seems that it's not always six o'clock anymore."

I patted his arm consolingly. "You were a hatter, once. Maybe you can spend your time making hats like you used to do."

He shook his head. "She won't come back, my Queen. She will never admire my work, she will never tell me how beautiful she finds my hats. She will forget me. I am a mad man, totally bonkers," he laughed hard at this, as if to prove his point, "but when she looked at me, when she put her hands upon my face…My mind never felt more at peace. There is something about her, that makes me calmer, that soothes me. I probably am not making any sense to you, am I?"

It was my turn to look away, as tears threatened to fall. There was a time when I hoped that _I_ could be the one to cure his madness.

"Trust me, Tarrant, you are making perfect sense. And trust me on this, also. She will come back. And when she does, it will be solely for _you._ Once she has all the answers she is seeking, she will see that there is only one way to happiness for her. And that way is down a rabbit-hole, out of a tiny door, into a crazy wood and at a tea table next to you."

He looked at me again, and I noticed that his eyes were starting to turn green once more. Truly the colour of hope. He smiled at me, and I was glad to have helped him to soothe at least a little of his grievance.

"I will wait for her, then." He linked arms with me as his smile became a full grin.

"In the meantime, why don't we join the festivities? Oh, and you're invited for tea, tomorrow, my Queen; I won't accept a 'no' for an answer, except if it starts with an 'M', but as you certainly know, 'no' starts with an 'N'. So, tea it is. But you have to bring your own spoon, since I don't seem to be able to find mine. It's something that has to do with the Hare throwing them at everyone, I'm sure…"

I smiled, as I was led to the party listening to his incoherent babble. I couldn't help but wonder about the similarities between my champion and myself. After all, she took a responsibility as great as mine, when she made Tarrant fall in love with her.

As much as my people's well-being depended on me, the happiness of a mad hat-maker depended upon her, and I dearly hoped she would realize it as soon as she possibly could.

The end.


End file.
